
(Also known as: “Things we all know, but still ‘accidentally’ forget…”)
Let me first start with this…
Honestly, I don’t get it.
You’ve played padel 43 times… and still show up in leggings with no pockets? Shorts so tight they couldn’t hold a single grape, let alone a padel ball?
It’s a mystery for the ages. Like why we clap when a plane lands, or why socks disappear in the laundry.
Just… bring a pocket. Or a ball clip. Or something. Because holding a spare ball in your armpit isn’t a long-term strategy.
So get yourself some decent leggings or shorts that can actually hold a ball.
That would be my first advice when you start with Padel.
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Rule #1 – Thou shalt not leave balls rolling freely
Loose balls = chaos.
They’re like banana peels for ankles. 🚫🍌
Put them in your pocket or in the net — not rolling around like ankle grenades.
Save lives. Store your balls responsibly.
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Rule #2 – Always say “sorry” for that disgusting winner
Did you hit a horrible, off-the-frame, low-speed drop shot that somehow killed the point?
You monster.
Say sorry. Smile. Act humble. Inside? Be proud. 😇
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Rule #3 – Net position isn’t optional
If your teammate is serving, you should be at the net, ready to pounce—not casually sipping water or adjusting your ponytail.
This is war. (Well, sort of.)
And the one serving… keep the extra ball in your pocket.
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Rule #4 – No coaching mid-point
Unless you’re coaching yourself after missing yet another bandeja.
(“Come on, Sarah, get it together!”) That’s allowed.
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Rule #5: Accept your partner’s advice.
Let it go in one ear and out the other — with a smile.
Your teammate means well. Truly. Even when they shout “MOVE!” like you’re dodging a truck, not a fuzzy yellow ball. Nod, smile, maybe even say, “Great tip!” Then carry on doing exactly what you were doing.
Because padel is about teamwork… and also pretending you’re listening. Stay polite, stay humble, and remember: if you’re going to ignore advice, at least do it with charm.
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Rule #6 – Applaud the enemy
If your opponent hits a ridiculous shot—clap. Or at least raise your eyebrows in respectful pain.
It’s classy, and slightly intimidating. ✨
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Rule #7 – No judging warm-ups
Yes, she just hit 10 clean volleys in a row.
No, that doesn’t mean she’s a pro.
Wait for the match. Then judge.
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Rule #8 – Celebrate with style, not screams
Fist bump? Yes.
Samba dance across the net? Save that for after the match. 💃
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Rule #9 – Don’t block the door
Padel courts have weird little doors. Don’t stand in them. Don’t lean on them.
They’re not your throne. Other people want to play too.
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Rule #10 – Be kind, unless it’s a tiebreak
Then you may politely destroy them.
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Bonus Rule: Padel is serious fun
We’re here to win points and make fun.
So laugh, sweat, smash, say sorry, and do it all again next week. 💛

